Sexism & babies

Most people we interact with now know we are having a boy. I am excited to know but that largely has to do with being able to more concretely think of names and such. The biggest concern for me is health.

The thing that disturbs me is that even before the baby is out in the world, the world seems to greet him with its sexist notions. So many people have voiced the assumption that Seppo must be happy and that I must be bummed. Several others have said I must be glad we “don’t have to worry since [we] are getting a son out of the way with the first child,” as though there is less value in a girl or we would have kept trying until there was a boy.

Don’t get me wrong; I know most people are just trying to find something nice to say, and are fumbling for something positive and boy-specific to say in regards to the news. But it doesn’t stop the feelings of dismay from filling me up. It’s these subtle sexist notions and “innocent” comments that help prop up institutionalized sexism, and it sucks that it’s starting already.

Personal finance

We bought a car! I have the pic in my camera, but haven’t uploaded it yet. I shall soon. We went with the Mazda3. It’s quite beautiful and I definitely love the bluetooth integration of modern cars. Heh. It has enough space for the baby (obviously) in the backseat and Mobi in the hatch, which was our biggest concern in picking out a car for our growing family, aside from the presence of air conditioning.

We sold our Civic! I took a final drive but I need to get a final picture of the car that’s served us so well for the last 7 years. *hug* We need to get it smogged and then we’ll be ready to pass it on to the new owner, who is our coworker. It is the cleanest and best maintained it’s ever been (new tires last year, 2nd 90k tuneup this year, fan fixed, rebuilt transmission last year, etc.) and I know it’ll treat the new owner well for years to come. If it weren’t for the lack of air conditioning and 4 doors, we could have kept this for another 10 years.

We are refinancing the house to a significantly lower rate, which will lower the total paid interest and potentially cut several years off the total lifetime of the loan (depending on which strategy we decide to go with)!

We still have to decide if we’ll be able to fix the upstairs bathroom before the baby arrives or not. If not, we can always wash the baby in the kitchen sink for several years. That sink is hugenormous, after all, and at a much better height for easy baby-washing, with a spray head even. 🙂 The issue with fixing is both money and time. Obviously, we need to save money to be able to take time off after the baby is born, but we also need money for daycare going past that, and for various baby-related costs.

And on top of everything, the Hawaii trip is a go! You’d think we were nuts but we know this will be the last vacation we’ll be able to take in a long time. And given that in our 11 year relationship history that we’ve only really gone on two other vacations (honeymoon in 2006 and Tulum in 2007), we really wanted to make one more trip for just the two of us. Plus, the tickets only cost $10 due to years of saved up frequent flyer miles. 🙂 We’ll need to book lodgings and a rental car, but it’s so nice to have the tickets for just about free.

Because I am such a skinflint, all this money spending is making my head spin and my palms sweat profusely. But I know we’ve managed to do all this very economically and with plenty of slush in our various savings accounts for emergencies, long-term savings, and planned spendings (like the car, which we’d been saving for for a while now), so I know I need to just unclench a little and breathe. Plus, the refinance actually saves us money in both the long term and on a monthly basis, so it’s the right thing to do, even with a little cash out of pocket.

100 Days of Solitude

I looked at our pregnancy progress tracker program this morning, only to find that we have 100 days left until our estimated due date.

Koreans celebrate the 100th day after birth. How different our lives are today from how it will be on the flip side of the axis.

Another floor pic!

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Originally uploaded by eingy.

Isn’t it beautiful?

Hawaii, here we come!

We don’t have any solid plans yet, but we got clearance for vacation time off the third week of August for one last trip for just the two of us, before the baby comes. We are figuring out which island to go to.

Yay!

The car decision is still in progress. We may go get it this weekend, I think. Very exciting.

Our floor

The Pledge is for the table, so do not panic that you’ll slip to your death on our floors. 😀

Floor and random thoughts

The floor guys arrived this morning. We won’t be able to go anywhere in the upstairs floor until Saturday! :O I am so excited to go home today and see what they’ve done.

On a completely unrelated note, I was looking through my archives from April 2006 to look up something about our wedding, when I noticed my notes from our honeymoon. I really want to finish writing up my honeymoon report. I also want to write up a real Tulum report too. I had kept a little notebook for the trip, so I have all sorts of tiny bits of memories jotted down. I will have to do it before the baby arrives.

I had forgotten how much I loved the National Gallery and British Museum.

More awesomeness

I already mentioned that people are awesome, and they continue to be awesome. We’ve received an adorable bath set from our friends J, R, and A in Arizona, and the diaper shipment from our friends S & V in Connecticut has arrived!

The grand-parents-to-be on the husband’s side have sent over cute pictures of the husband and promised to send over nice pics of them that we can frame and hang up on the wall for the kiddo to see everyday when they are not visiting. I need to ask my family for the same. They also seem to have gone shopping for the kid. 🙂 Please, if you are reading this, don’t buy too much!

My family is going to send over some hand-me-downs, as is my best friend’s older sister, who had a son in January. Our friends H & S said we can borrow their awesome infant carseat when their son outgrows it, just in time for our baby’s ETA!

Just as when we got married, we are so surrounded by a supportive community of family and friends, who help us in both tangible and intangible ways, with hardware we can use for the baby and with emotional support when we are worried, and some even with some muscle-power to move heavy things like the filing cabinet (thanks S!).

Was I stressed last week? Yeah. But after talking with Seppo, seeing the house take shape, and signing up for one of the three classes we plan to take, I feel a sense of ease and well-being this week.

The Arrival of the Little Bro

Beware! Run for cover! The little brother unit hits town on Saturday. Dun dun dun!

Highlights from this past week

• Checking out Taste of Joy, the Southern bistro, with friends A&B.
• Watching UP!
• Taxiball getting featured as New & Noteworthy.
• Civic getting fixed for a much more minor issue than I feared.
• Meeting some awesome local bloggers at Vic’s Chaat!