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January 2009
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The body wants what it wants

January 29, 2009   

I think I’m hungry all the time. This might be psychosomatic though.

What’s definitely not psychosomatic is the intense cramps I had last night. My stomach area had a ton of sharp pains that had me panting shallowly. I hope nothing is going wrong.

Also, now we are in Day #3 or 4 past expected period date, so it’s pretty safe to assume the tests were right and I am preggo.

Oops & making plans

January 27, 2009   

My friend Y IMed me today, curious if I had heard rumor or news regarding our mutual friend M being engaged! During our excited/happy speculations about our beloved friend, I totally spilled to her that I had seen positive pregnancy results.

Seriously, I need to keep it wrapped up! It is hard. I knew it would be hard.

I didn’t have as severe cramps today. I did, however, have increased backpain. Boo! Boo-urns! My breasts are as tender as they were several days ago. It’s all very exciting.

I took yet ANOTHER test and it also came out positive. 🙂 I called my doctor and made two appointments: one with the nurse practitioner I’ve been seeing and one with the OBGYN that I’ve never seen. It’ll be exciting to talk to them about what is going on.

We had a two-hour discussion of our budget for the coming year. It was all pretty positive and we have set some goals to see where we can improve. We discussed the possibility of welcoming a child into the world this fiscal year, as well as potentially getting a new car if we have to.

I really need to file our taxes. I am expecting the last of the papers to come in this week and next, and I’ll have them done by Valentine’s Day. That’ll make a nice little impact on our operating budget.

Proof

January 26, 2009   

I know. Ridiculous, yeah? 😀

Eating monster

January 26, 2009   

I usually turn into an eating monster a couple of days before my period. I’ve turned into an eating monster again, but who knows if this is regular PMS hunger or real pregnancy hunger.

Also, today’s visit to the falafel shop overwhelmed me with the fried smell. Paranoid, overreacting, or sensitive to smells? Who knows. Usually, it’s a smell I’d love.

The weird thing is that I keep being like, “This might just be PMS symptoms,” but I’ve read a ton of stuff, and I know hCG isn’t just going to be floating in my system for no reason. I’m familiar with chemical reagents! I know what’s going on.

And my breasts have been sensitive for days. That never lasts for more than two days.

I guess it could be ectopic or have a genetic issue that would not be viable. But still. I’m totally pregnant, right?

In real life, I am not a nervous person. I think when the doctor confirms it, I will feel like I have permission to let go of the leash on my excitement a little. 🙂

What's this cramping pain?

January 26, 2009   

I half think it’s my period coming on. I almost took another test today, but with my husband’s input, I decided to wait until tomorrow. Since I work from home tomorrow, I can also call my doctor’s office tomorrow, post-test, with some level of privacy.

Anyway, from the moment I woke up to, well, now, I’ve been having deep cramps in my stomach/belly region. It’s sort of a sinusoidal pain, cresting cyclically and making me wince. It’s definitely worse than my usual cramps but better than incapacitating food poisoning cramps.

What’s it mean? My reading seems to indicate that cramps are fairly normal at this stage, but who knows. Maybe it really just is my period coming on.

As excited as I feel, I won’t be too upset if it’s my period, but I’m really trying to pay attention to the minute details of my body, just in case I’m catching the beginnings of our first child. 🙂 I don’t want the fear of not being right keep me from being in the moment. 🙂

Also, if I were a betting person, I would guess a girl, if this pregnancy works out. 🙂 This is due to some voodoo math with the ovulation date. Dun dun dun!

Sleep

January 25, 2009   

I didn’t sleep too well last night. I figured it was some combination of indigestion (I kept burping — ew!) and excitement. I couldn’t fall asleep until really late, and I couldn’t stay asleep, so I woke up at 7am, which is completely uncharacteristic.

Now, it’s 8:45pm, and I’m tucked into bed, ready to sleep! I wonder if it is all just nerves or if I am actually experiencing nausea and fatigue as pregnancy symptoms. Who knows. And who knows if they are psychosomatic or not?

I went on a walk with U today and totally lied to her face when she asked me if I had “had any luck yet”. :p Them’s the shakes at this stage of the game. Who knows if things will stick.

Even though I keep wanting to talk to someone about this, I am thinking it is best not to tell people until after 12 weeks. I don’t want to tell the families until even later, so there isn’t vast disappointment should things head south.

Because I am paranoid

January 25, 2009   

Today, I really feel like I’m about to get my period. So I retook the cheap-o test when I woke up, which gave me a line so faint that I wasn’t sure of anything, then in the afternoon, I retook the Clearblue Easy, which gave me a faint yet distinct positive read.

It’s funny, because I keep expecting it to not be true. Like I am waiting for someone to confirm it’s true, but as we discussed last night, I guess it’s true unless something else happens to change that. So here we are: we are already pregnant.

SO WEIRD.

I am both excited and weirded out. I guess it’s hard not to be. 🙂

One + and two sets of double lines

January 25, 2009   

Everything is quite faint however. The first test was at 1pm-ish. The two tests after that were at around 5:30pm. Today is 10 days after ovulation, at my best guess based on my charts. Dun dun dun!

Within the hour, I’ve, of course, created a blog, because this is how I roll. Roll! *grabs feet, rolls away*

Conferences I want to attend

January 23, 2009   

I’m going to She’s Geeky next Friday! Anyone else? I’d also like to go to the following:

I am going to actually make an attempt to attend some of these at some point. Are there any others any of you would recommend? Any that any of you are going to? She’s Geeky is a relative bargain at $69 for a day, $119 (I think) for two days. Register by tomorrow if you are going! It’s in Mountain View.

Let the Dancing Commence!

January 13, 2009   

America’s Best Dance Crew Season 3 is coming! Watch for it this Thursday. And if you miss it, it’ll rerun over and over on MTV or MTV2, so don’t worry about it. 😀

Woo hoo!!!!